Thursday, June 21, 2012

Your Kung Fu is Weak

A Sage Fight Variant for 4 players. 

Rules modified from Official Sage Fight Rules 


Divide into two teams. Each team should have a fighter and a caller. The fighter gets to wave their hands around like a Kung Fu master; the caller gets to overact and make up silly Kung Fu techniques. Figure out who is who. Also figure out which team goes first, by whatever method you choose.

1.The Fighters face off at about arms length distance and strikes kung fu poses. The Callers retire to a safe vantage point. 

2.The first team's caller begins by declaiming in their best Shaw Bros voice (NSFW) "You fool! Try my..." followed by whatever Kung Fu technique they can come up with. (E.g. "You Fool! Try my Backwards Crane technique! Hiyaaaah!") 

3.Both players switch to a new pose. You must keep your balance and not move after taking your new pose. Only one foot can be moved with each stance switch. In addition, the caller's teammate must try his or her hardest to demonstrate the technique. In the above example, they must do something crane-like and backwards. Only the Fighter on the same team must display the technique. 

4.Once the Fighters have assumed their new poses, play moves to the other team. They reciprocate with a new technique and yell, and so on.

Goal: Touch the other Fighter with the palm of your hand. If you want to make it harder, you can only touch them on the torso or the back of the palm.

Fighters: Display your caller's techniques. People are encouraged to be lenient about whether or not a technique is being displayed; Kung Fu is not an exact science. At least make the attempt. Failure to do so will result in a loss on account of Kung Fu Treachery.

Callers: Make up interesting techniques. Remember to yell at the end. Amuse everyone.

Some samples:

  • "You fool, try my drunken tiger stance! Waaa!"
  • "Well done, but no match for Monkey Riding Crane. Hwwwwaaa!"
  • " You Bastard! Tigers falls from Bamboo Tree! Whooopaah!"

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